Daily Foolishness

Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in “Fine.“

Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Whatever you do, don’t do It!

Loud Sigh: This is actually not a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. “That’s okay” means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question it or faint. Just say “You’ re welcome.“ (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says “Thanks a lot“… that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say “You’re welcome” as that will bring on a “Whatever“).

Whatever: Is a woman’s way of saying F— YOU!

Don’t worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking “What’s wrong“‘ For the woman’s response refer to #3.